The Setup
Let me paint you a picture. I am 34 years old and drink caffeine like it’s a personality trait. I have the lower back of a man who moved a couch wrong in 2019 and never recovered. And every time I see a video of our ancestors churning butter or walking 15 miles to school uphill both ways, I feel a deep, existential embarrassment.
We are soft, friends and also tired. We have “brain fog” from looking at a spreadsheet for three hours.
A few months ago, I fell down a rabbit hole. It started with a TikTok about “nose-to-tail” eating. Then I read some old-school nutrition books that basically said, “If your great-great-grandpa didn’t eat it, neither should you.” That led me to a brand called Ancestral Supplements.
And before you roll your eyes, yes—I know. The name sounds like something a guy with a man bun and a didgeridoo would sell you at a farmer’s market. But I was desperate. I was tired of the synthetic, lab-made vitamins that made my pee look like radioactive lemonade.
The “Yuck” Factor
Here is the thing about ancestral supplements: They are just dried organs.
Liver. Heart. Kidney. Spleen. Thymus.
If you walked up to me six months ago and said, “Hey, eat this dried cow pancreas,” I would have called security. But the magic trick is the capsule. You don’t taste a thing. No metallic aftertaste. No chewing on weird textures. Ancestral supplements just a pill.
But the idea of it is weird. I had a moment standing in my kitchen holding the bottle of “Liver” thinking, I am literally about to eat the filter organ of a grass-fed cow from New Zealand. It felt primal and little wrong. It felt like something my grandpa would have nodded approvingly at while smoking a cigarette indoors.
The First Week (The Placebo or The Magic?)
I started with just the Liver. One bottle. No other changes to my diet (which, full disclosure, includes a lot of microwave popcorn and cold pizza).
Day 3: Nothing.
Day 5: I woke up before my alarm. Not in a groggy, “I hate the sun” way. In a “Huh, I’m ready to go” way.
Day 7: I was driving home from work and realized I didn’t have that 2:00 PM crash where you stare at the wall and question your existence.
Was it the iron? The Vitamin A? The mysterious “energy factor” that modern science hasn’t bottled yet? I don’t know. But my husband looked at me and said, “You seem less… murdery lately.”
That’s a win.
The Real Test (Trauma vs. Tallow)
The weirdest thing happened when I added the “Brain” supplement. Yes, they make a brain one.
I take it for focus. But here is the human part—the part that isn’t clinical or scientific. When I take these pills, I feel a connection to the literal chain of life. I know that sounds crunchy. But think about it: For 99.9% of human history, we didn’t throw away the organs. We ate them. We revered them.
I started sleeping better on the “Spleen” (which is great for immunity). My skin stopped being a dry, flaky mess on the “Collagen” (which isn’t organs, but bone broth).
I’m not saying I turned into a superhero. I’m not saying you should stop your medications. But I am saying that my chronic “meh” feeling has lifted.
The Honest Review (Because I’m not a shill)
The Bad:
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The smell. The bottle smells like a petting zoo. Keep the lid on tight and wash your hands after touching the pills.
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The price. It’s not cheap. Eating liver from the grocery store is 3.Dryingitandputtingitincapsulesis45. You pay for the convenience and the fact that the cows are living in a field, not a factory.
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The burps. Sometimes you burp and for half a second, you taste the pasture. Drink a lot of water.
The Good:
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I haven’t been sick once this winter. (Knock on wood.)
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My nails are actually growing instead of peeling like onion skin.
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I feel grounded. That’s the only word for it.
The Verdict (Written in Human)
Look, we live in a world of fake food. Our carrots are bred to be perfectly straight. Our bread sits on a shelf for six months. We are starving for nutrients while being overfed on calories.
Ancestral supplements aren’t a magic pill. You can’t take them while eating Doritos and expect to live to 120. But if you are a tired, stressed-out modern human who knows deep down that you aren’t getting what you need from your grocery store chicken breast? Give it a shot.
Start with the Liver. Just one capsule a day. See if you stop feeling like a zombie.
Worst case scenario: You waste forty bucks and have some weird burps.
Best case scenario: Your ancestors finally stop rolling their eyes at you.
Disclaimer: I’m just a person on the internet who likes dried cow organs. Talk to your doctor before starting any new supplement, especially if you have health conditions like hemochromatosis (iron overload) or gout. Seriously. Don’t be dumb.
